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How To Make Baby Sleep Well

Sandy asks…

Does anyone have any tips on having a two year old share a bedroom with an infant?

Our second baby is due and my son will be about 2 1/2 years old. I plan on having the baby in with me for a while, but after that they will have to share a bedroom. Any tips for a bedroom routine?

Admin answers:

We put baby in crib and our older girl in our bed. Big girl is allowed to watch 30 min. Video in our bed then she has to go to sleep. We put her in her bed (baby was long asleep) when we are ready for bed. She’s been doing this for quite a while and it’s great. Also, take big one potty when you put him in his bed…he’ll stay dry all night.

Daniel asks…

Can someone use a video baby monitor to see inside my apartment?

I have a video baby monitor that has excellent range, but it got me thinking, couldn’t someone buy the same monitor and switch to the same channel and see inside my apartment if they wanted to?

I have the “Summer Infant Day & Night Handheld Color Video Monitor” and I know it can work with an extra camera (if I bought one)… so in theory, couldn’t that work for my neighbors too?

Admin answers:

It may be possible my sister discovered she has the same baby monitor as her neighbour. One night she just put my niece to bed went and layed down and went to sleep. She woke up a few hours later by this time is was about 1am and her husband was in bed as well now. When all of a sudden she heard a low man laugh coming from the monitor she woke up her husband half screaming and told him to get the baby. He got up realising something was wrong and ran into the nursery and picked up my niece and bought her into their bedroom. They couldn’t find the source of the noise and so the baby was in her room for the rest of the night. Then my brother-in-law was talking to them the next morning and they discovered they have the same baby monitor and they can hear them sometimes too and they freaked out when they first discovered it. I’m guesssing that the video one’s though would be different because they have the camera but anything is possible, perhaps you could ring the company and ask them about it.

Paul asks…

Whats the song called that goes.”cause your my baby my baby my baby?” its a new rap song.?

it might be instead of my baby my favorite my favorite. its rap though. thanks

Admin answers:

“baby” by ll cool j ft. The dream



Radio killer
Y’all think they can handle this one man
Call the radio and tell ‘em this your song (this your song, this your song, this your song, this your song)
Girl come on (girl come on, girl come on,)
Cuz im your baby, im your baby, im your baby, im your baby
Im your baby, your baby, your baby, your baby
Im your baby, your baby, your baby, your baby
Im your baby, your baby

Met this little girl, she was off the hook
I got cold chills when her body shook
Hot sex on the platter no need to cook
I let her steal my heart like a horny crook
Had her grinding and winding against my leg
She messin with my head, wanna play in the bed
Sexy pumps on, toenails red
Your bodys a gun baby, pump me full of lead
It hard to hold you when you movin’ vulgar
Peace sign on your eyes like John Travolta
My pulp ain’t fiction, it’s an addiction
To see your booty clap on the floor in the kitchen
Nasty girl, taught me all the lingo
While mama play bingo, she ride mandingo
She dont give a damn if im married or single
She makes me tingle

Shawty im your baby, im your baby, im your baby, im your baby
Im your baby, your baby, your baby, your baby
Im your baby, your baby, your baby, your baby
Im your baby, your baby

She likes Hip-Hop and R&B
Her life time goal is to be on TV
She looking for a man that could give her a break
Like Usher or Justin Timberlake
Im really not sure if her breasts are fake
Cuz wit whipped cream on em, they taste just like cake
We drink some beer, inside of daddy’s ’64
She shot me in the back with cupids arrow
We finish the 6-pac, she push the seat back
Pulled up her dress n she let me peep that
Im Drunk as a skunk, feeling all dirty
Truck stop bathroom at 7:30
Bought her some dessert, give a damn if its early
Head spinnin around like roller derby
Everything about her says you dont deserve me
I hope im worthy

Cuz shawty im your baby, im your baby, im your baby, im your baby
Im your baby, your baby, your baby, your baby
Im your baby, your baby, your baby, your baby
Im your baby, your baby

(Cuz im your baby)
You need somethin’ like me? (Good luck)
Cuz he ain’t nothin’ like me (no)
You can search but you never gone find
A love thats quite like mine (no)
Need a man that can love you good
And treat you like he should
With me shawty you the shit
He might be good but he aint like this
Cuz im your baby

In the back of the pickup, clothes the rip up
She see my chrome wheels, it gets more real
Running and laughing, music blasting
Side over the road, bent over crashing
Mouth all dry, can feel the urge
If you see my mama, dont say a word
The cops wanna know im a word are slurred
Dont ask me officer ask her
Wanna another drink baby she like sure
Wanna hit the club she like I dont curr
She all in the rearview doin her hurr
Hairspray and lip gloss everywhurr
This all happens on an average day
Your life is a trip girl, im here to stay
Never had a girl make me feel this way
Even tho I had to pay

Cuz shawty im your baby, im your baby, im your baby, im your baby
Im your baby, your baby, your baby, your baby
Im your baby, your baby, your baby, your baby
Im your baby, your baby

Robert asks…

If you have a baby video monitor, does it work? Would you recommend it?

My baby is 7/12 months and has her room, she’s been in her crib since 4 months, however I haven’t left her alone yet. My husband and I sleep in her room in a mattress. I’m thinking of buying a video monitor to leave her alone but at least I’ll be okay knowing that I can see her.

If you have one, what kind is it and would you recommend it?

Also, I want one thats in color, are there any like that?


Admin answers:

I have a video baby monitor, and it’s in color. The brand is Summer. It works well, and I really like it. I had a C-section, and we have a very tall bed. I couldn’t get into bed the first week and a half after surgery, so I slept on the couch. The video monitor gave me piece of mind because we left my son sleep in his bassinet in our room with my husband. I was the one getting up at night, so the video monitor gave me peace of mind. I could see what he was doing, I could hear his noises, and I could tell if he was awake or just making noise. I got mine at Target. I recommend it if you would like to be able to see your baby.

Helen asks…

things to do when child your babysitting goes to bed?

i have to babysit tonight and it’s going to be really late, i Always bring a book and my ipod and just sit and watch tv. what else is there to do when the baby goes to bed?

Admin answers:

Take a nap. Play video/computer games. Talk on the phone. Doodle/draw.

Ruth asks…

Pregnancy and Baby care, is there anything I really need to know?

I am 21 weeks pregnant, this is my first child; and we only recently found out it was a girl.

I want to go through an all natural birth (no medication), but I’m really nervous about it; I’ve heard that it can be extremely painful, especially for those who have never given birth before. Is that true?
I also heard that some doctors push for first time moms to have a c-section is that true? If so, why?
I do plan on taking Lamaze classes, but when would be the best time to sign up for them?

After the baby is born I heard that usually if you don’t feed the baby right away the doctors will give them formula, I know you have to have a list of things that if you don’t want the doctor to do or do want them to do. But what are some things that I should consider so that I make sure everything goes as best a possible?

I have also heard that breastfeeding is the best thing for the baby. So I want to avoid formula, but is there anything I should take while breastfeeding to give the baby better nutrients?
Is it better for the baby to take it right from the breast, or from a bottle? I know I won’t always be able to feed the baby from the breast, but I want to know which is truly better for her. (I do plan I investing in a breast pump)

I’ve also heard that babies tend to scratch themselves should I invest in mittens or just keep a close eye on her nail length?

I’ve heard having a lot of burp cloths, bibs, and blankets is a must. But besides basic clothing is there anything else that I would need?

I’ve heard that pacifiers prevent SIDS in babies, but is it a medical condition that starts it? Or is it something that any baby can get?

Any and all information about birth and the days afterward would be a huge help.

I would love to hear from other experienced mothers who have gone through the all natural birth.

Please and Thank You!

Admin answers:

Firstly, your doctor SHOULD NOT push you for a cesarean unless it is medically necessary, ie. Will save either the life or your or your baby. You should have it in your birth plan that you do not want a c-section unless it is an emergency if you are at all concerned about this. Hopefully you picked a doctor you can trust and feel comfortable with at the beginning of your pregnancy, but it is never to late to change. You could always think about looking into birthing centers with midwives in your area, who would be far less inclined to push you for the section (unless of course you needed one) or think about hiring a doula who could help support you through your labour and be your advocate in terms of your choices. Birthing classes are a great way to prepare for your birth, I’ve heard good things about Lamaze. Normally (I am training within the health service in the UK) our ladies take classes in the last 4-6 weeks of their pregnancy, so 34-36 weeks but it’s probably best to contact the class provider and ask when they recommend.

A doctor or nurse should not give your baby formula without your consent. Again, if this is something you are concerned about, you should talk to your doctor and have it explicitly written in your birth plan. Ideally, a woman should have skin to skin contact with her baby IMMEDIATELY after birth as this encourages your baby to breastfeed straight away (the baby will root around for the breast on his/her own after birth); we like you to have initiated feeding within one hour of birth but if you don’t manage this, it doesn’t mean you won’t be able to feed. Feeding from the breast is the more ideal way to feed the baby as s/he will gain more benefits from this in terms of bonding and bacteria colonization, however, bottle feeding is not bad for the baby. It is recommended that you try to exclusively feed from the breast for six weeks in order to establish good feeding before you attempt to give EBM (expressed breast milk) in a bottle as bottle fed babies feed differently to breastfed babies and this can confuse the baby and cause latching issues.
This series of videos (in the bar on the left) are brilliant for explaining breastfeeding fully:

Mittens are recommended although not vital.

Babies are the same as any human, they have very basic needs, keep them warm, dry, fed and give them plenty of love and you can’t really go wrong. All you need is somewhere for the baby to sleep, a bassinet is normally sufficient for a newborn (bed sharing tends to be discouraged for safety reasons, although if you do your research and fully commit to it, then bed sharing can be a perfectly safe experience); food for your baby – your breasts should do; clothes and blankets to keep your baby warm (remember that a baby only needs one more layer than you do, your home should be heated to around 68 degrees so don’t overdo the blankets) and lots of love and attention. If you have a car, a car seat is a must and you’ll want to get lots of diapers and cotton wool or cloth wipes (baby wipes aren’t recommended for newborns as they are packed with chemicals).

No one really knows what causes SIDS, it’s not one condition but a terminology for something we can’t really explain or understand. Pacifiers do not help to prevent SIDS and are not recommended when trying to establish breastfeeding.

If you are interested in a natural birth, a really good author to read would be Ina May Gaskin (she’s sort of my idol). Her books, “Ina May’s guide to childbirth” and “Spiritual Midwifery” both contain an array of information about natural birth and accounts from women who have experienced it.

Good Luck!

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Posted by Admin - April 18, 2014 at 4:05 am

Categories: Parenting   Tags:

How To Make Baby Sleep Well

Richard asks…

When did your newborn start sleeping through the night?

Did you do anything to help get the baby adjusted to your schedule or did he/she just start sleeping through the night on his/her own?
We started burrito wrapping our baby and it worked wonders!
Both of our boys only kept us up for one week once they were home from the hospital! I’m thinking we got really lucky!

Admin answers:

My oldest two kids slept great after about 2 weeks. But as for my thrid child she is 6 mos old and still want sleep all night. We have tried feeding her cereal right at bedtime, we tried putting her in the bed with us, we tried bathing her at bedtime. I am running out of ideas. If you figure anything out PLEASE let m know

Steven asks…

would a bottle help my newborn sleep through the night?

My son wont sleep during the night, unless he’s with me or in his car seat. I’ve put his car seat in his crib, but then he always wakes up to be fed. If I stored breastmilk in bottles to give him at night, do you think he’d sleep better? Every time I breastfeed at night I could watch an entire movie or two in one sitting because he thinks it’s time to wake up and play.
I talk quietly at night with lights dim, with no background noise…i dont know what to do. I get no sleep.
He’s 1 week but i wouldnt bottle feed until 5 or 6 weeks, when id be going back to work. I just wanted to know if it might work before I planned on bottle feeding.
sorry, the questions worded wrong. what i meant is “sleep better during the night.” dumb moment on my part, i know he wont sleep through the night. :)

Admin answers:

Newborn breast fed babies are going to want and need to eat every 1-2 hours around the clock. Their tummies are tiny and breast milk is very digestible. It is not unheard of, but newborns younger than 6 weeks rarely sleep more than 2-3 hours at a stretch regardless if they are breast fed or bottle fed. You have some unreasonable expectations of your newborn. Perhaps you would benefit from a book on child care such as “What to Expect the First Year”. This will help you know what is developmentally appropriate for your son at different ages. Your tiny baby is so very new to this strange new world. He has just spent the first 40 weeks of his life nestled snuggly and securely inside you where his every need was met without any effort on his part. He was never hungry or cold or lonely. He never had gas or bright lights shining or had to sleep on a firm mattress. Your baby is adjusting to a completely different way of life than he knows. You are also adjusting to a completely different way of life than you know. Sleepless nights and exhaustion are normal parts of parenthood that don’t fully go away, ever. At only 1 week, your son has no idea what it means to wake up and play. All he knows are his immediate needs of being fed, kept dry and clean, and sleep. It is also completely normal for your breast fed son to take a good long time to finish a feeding. In the beginning, newborns aren’t always efficient at nursing and can take a long time to finish. It is not at all unusual for a breast fed newborn to want to eat 1-2 hours around the clock and for every feeding to take 45 mintues or longer. What this means is that you may feel like your baby is always attached to your breast and it won’t be too far from the truth. As your baby grows bigger, he will begin to take less time to eat and eventually will be able to go longer between feedings. Don’t rush it. At this point in time, it’s helpful to just focus on immediate needs such as feeding your baby on demand and sleeping whenever he sleeps. It doesn’t get much done around the house, but it builds up your milk supply plus helps your body recover from childbirth. There will always be dirty dishes, dirty laundry, grocery shopping, floors to mop, and beds to make, but your baby will only be tiny this one time. I am mom to 4 who were all breast fed as babies. I found it very helpful to make a little “nursing nest” for those first few weeks of my baby’s life. I chose a chair or one end of the couch that was comfortable. I placed pillows close by plus a foot stool and an afghan. I had a table close by to hold a glass of water, the TV remote, the cordless phone, and a basket of snacks such as granola bars, crackers, and nuts. Than, when I was up at all hours of the day and night feeding my baby, I had everything I needed close by. I could even doze off a bit while breast feeding and get some rest. This is just a stage in your baby’s life that will pass by soon enough. It doesn’t seem like it now, but one day you’ll look back on these early days and be sad that they are gone. ADDED: At only 1 week, your newborn son needs you to hold him frequently. This is a bonding time for the 2 of you. It helps him transition from always being with you to being with you only part of the time. You can not hold a newborn too much. When he is older you can work on being apart for longer periods of time. Have him sleep next to you in a bassinet or pack and play. Some parents opt for co-sleeping. Your closeness is familiar to him and he wants to be assured you are close by. Newborns often sleep a lot during the day as it is their way of blocking out stimulus such as light, noise, and activity. It is common for newborns to be awake longer at night simply because the stimulus is less and the night is more familiar to them since they spent so much time in the dark. It’s their time to take a look around at the new world they find themselves suddenly thrust into. As with everything having to do with a new baby in the house, time is going to make things better. Keep your baby close and feed him on demand for now. There’s plenty of time when he’s bigger to get him used to sleeping alone for longer periods of time.

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Posted by Admin - April 17, 2014 at 4:05 pm

Categories: Parenting   Tags:

How To Make Baby Sleep Well

Sandy asks…

baby bedding question?

I was just curious at what age did you stop using the baby bedding you purchased? My kids are going to be about a year apart and I was wondering if I should purchase new bedding or switch the bedding from my oldest to my youngest? It is neutral so it will go with a boy or a girl. It is not a big deal if we need to purchase a new set.

Admin answers:

When they went to a new bed/toddler or twin. We bought new sheets to excite them about their new bed. We let them pick it out. We never had a problem with them wanting to go back to their old bed.

The first time we got new sheets was when we had our second child-2 years later.

We also got new sheets when we put them into daycare (crib sheets for their cots for nap time).

And we got new sheets for the oldest when we put her into a twin bed.

They were very excited to go from jungle baby theme to Elmo, to Dora, to Disney Princesses, to High School Musical.

Laura asks…

I am looking for a safari Baby crib set the matches this boy bed set from target.?

This is the little boy bed spread

It needs to have some what the same colors and animals. I would like it 2 match but it doesnt have 2 be perfect! Thanks for the help!!!
its the 9th bedding!! thanks!!

Admin answers:

The link you posted has 7 pages of bedding.

Target does have several different safari themed crib sets available.


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Posted by Admin - April 17, 2014 at 4:05 am

Categories: Parenting   Tags:

How To Make Baby Sleep Well

Donna asks…

7 week old baby sleeps inconsistently all night !!!?

So…I’m aware that my baby will be sleeping inconsistently at this age. But he seems to be consistently, inconsistent ! He has his usual bedtime routine of a bath, swaddle, then feeding at around 8p and he nods off to sleep at 830p. He will sleep for 4-5 hours after this first night feeding, but after that…he begins to wake up every 1 1/2 hours to eat. He usually goes 4 hours during the day between feedings and he’s eating 4oz or a bit more. During the first night feeding (after his bath) he will eat 4oz, but at those other feedings he will usually eat a lot less and not finish his bottle no matter how much we try to wake him up to finish. It’s as if he just wants to top off his meal from the 8p feeding and snack the rest of the night. Any advice or help would be so awesome !!

Admin answers:

Every baby is different but i did a bottle bath bottle bed routine and my son slept through after a couple of weeks. 5oz then bath then 9oz then bed. He used to polish both bottles off now he is on food and has food bath 7oz then bed and sleeps 7.30/8pm till half 6 in the morning he is now 19 weeks and has slept through for 2 months – still the odd night hie may get up once . Just bear with him stick with your routine and baby will work to it soon enough. If he is drinking the whole bottle before bed up it an oz and so on get him topped up. Or you could do a dream feed before you go to bed ( there is a nack to it and cam didnt take to it but i no many babies do) xx

Paul asks…

when do babies learn to sleep thru the night?

The only way my son will sleep thru the night is if he is in bed with me and my husband, How do i get him to sleep thru the night in his own bed?

Admin answers:

My son has slept through the night since he’s been born. The nurse brought him in from the nursery in the morning and said “your baby slept through the night!” and i was so excited!

All babies are different as i know we all say a million times here lol

but really, it’s different for every person. I was talking to someone about it yesterday and they said their youngest child didn’t sleep through the night until they were about 5!

Michael asks…

How can I get my baby to sleep through the night?

My baby boy is 10 months old. During the day he has two naps. One in the morning, which is about 2 hours long, and one in the afternoon, which is about half an hour to an hour long. He is very active during the day when awake. In the evenings we have the routine of taking a nice long bath, which he loves, and after that he’ll have his bottle and go to sleep. During the night he usually has tea by his side. He sleeps well until about 1am in the morning, sometimes even 10pm at night, and then he starts becoming very restless. He’ll start crying, and toss and turn, all while he’s eyes are closed. He will sleep for another 15 minutes and start the same thing again. This causes us as parents to be awake every 15 minutes trying to get him to calm down. Can it be that he is hyperactive? What can we do to make him sleep through the night?

Admin answers:

Firstly, babies have a tendency to wake up and most of the time there isn’t a lot we can do about it accept for ride it out and nudge in the right direction.

The advice from the previous poster about keeping things very calm, quiet and darkened when you get up to him through the night is very good advice it works a treat. Only very dull lights just enough for a nappy change if needed, and don’t talk any louder then a whisper or quiet shushes.

If there is a chance he is hungry just give him some formula through the night or water, nothing else.

You can’t really make a baby sleep through but you can do the above things to help encourage them to be calm and quiet through the night. Also make sure he gets enough sleep through the day, as much as he needs (his nap times sound fine!) an over-tired baby will also have a lot of trouble sleeping at night.

William asks…

How do you get your baby to sleep through the night?

I have a 14 month old and his pediatrician suggested that my baby shouldn’t need a bottle during the night and is only allow 16 oz of milk in the 24hr period. So For the past 2 nights, I let my baby drink 8oz of milk to fall asleep with. Once he fall asleep, I take the bottle away. He would get up couple hours later during the night and start crying. It hurts me to see him cry like that. The first night was so bad because he started crying at 2am and didn’t stop until almost 4am. Last night was a bit better. He woke up twice but only cried for 10 or 15 minutes then fell back asleep. Is this the right way to get my baby off the bottle during the night and to sleep through the night?

Admin answers:

Yes- your doing just fine.

I didn’t use bottles, so mine went to sleep without them but it only takes 2-4 nights and they will sleep through. It is very hard to listen to them crying but it is so much healthier for them in the long run if they get a full night sleep. Healthier for you too!

Take Care

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Posted by Admin - April 16, 2014 at 4:05 pm

Categories: Parenting   Tags:

How To Make Baby Sleep Well

David asks…

What if you’re sexually active and is the pill, but forgets to take the pill at the same time each day?

I’m on the pill and use a condom EVERY time I have sex. But, this is only the second month that I’ve been on Birth Control and I always forget to take the pill at the same time during the day. What does that mean? Will that give me a better chance of getting pregnant, because that is NOT what I want at all.

Admin answers:

It is best to take it at or close to the same time each day. Put your pills where you will see them at the same time, like when you get up or before you go to bed. Near your toothbrush, by the coffeemaker or cereal bowls, on your nitestand. Wherever you will see them and remember. I used to put mine on top of the microwave, which was right next to my coffeemaker. Another time, I put them on my nitestand, where I would always see them when I was going to bed.
If that strategy doesn’t work, get on a different form of birth control. There are more convenient forms available. The patch, and the Nuvaring, to name just two. The best is the IUD. It’s easily inserted at the doctor’s office (or clinic), has the highest rate of success at preventing pregnancy, lasts 5 or 10 years depending on which type you get, and all you have to do is a quick, painless 5 second check once a month to make sure it is still in place. You could put that on your calender so you don’t forget. If you ever decide you want to become pregnant, it is easily removed by the doctor or clinician, and fertility is restored almost instantly!
It seems a little pricey, but if you add up what your current method will cost over the same amount of time, it’s really a bargain. Plus, it’s way, way cheaper than having a baby! I highly recommend looking into it, as well as your other options.
Just stay away from the Depo Provera shot. That should be taken off the market. It ruins your teeth, thins your bones, and causes terrible weight gain. Nothing good about it, except it’s effective. But who’s going to want to sleep with you when you’re fat and toothless?
This is what I have learned over a lifetime of avoiding pregnancy and talking to others, as well. Hope it helps!

Donald asks…

Does anyone know the effects of the direction of the head of your bed on your dreams?

For example if the head of your bed is north you will dream a certain type of dream. The same for South, East, and West. I have read it in a book before, but do not remember. Any help is appreciated.

Admin answers:

Head pointing SOUTH is said to fan the flames of family fights. While it may be a sexually stimulating direction for necking and resting the head, sleep will be restless. Here, yellow tones calm insomnia; purple and lilac stimulate. When passion starts boiling over, light a candle or place a tall plant on bedstand for amore. But when you need a break from wind and waterbed aerobics, toss a handful of charcoal in a low clay pot and place near your headboard (and take a cold shower).

Head pointing SOUTH-EAST encourages social activity and clear communication in personal growth. Blues and greens are favored here. Vertically striped patterns of green and blue or a tabletop water chotscke is said to activate buoyant energy here.

Head facing SOUTH-WEST creates and enhances peaceful partnerships, although partners are said to become more cautious, hesitant to take risks. Drapes ,wallpaper or bedlinens with check patterns in shades of yellow and brown “ground” and enhance love energy.

Head facing EAST is perfect for pre-Baby Boomers. Good for increasing career-luck and keeping life busy. In this situation, for job opportunity, sleep on sheets of light green or blue pastel shades; increase intuition with a wicker or bamboo headboard.

Head pointing WEST tends to make one lazy: “wanting” the bucks or beaus, but lacking motivation or focus when going for the gold. Curvy patterns, warm pinks and maroons are said to increase intuition and non-verbal communication amongst bedpartners. Avoid grey or charcoal hues.

Head pointing NORTH is said to relieve insomnia and dampen down life activities. Warm pinks, mellow burgundy can enhance feelings of spirituality, peace of mind. Boost social engagements by adding brighter reds to the bedroom. To calm activity and busy-ness, place tall plants on either side of your headboard.

Head pointing NORTH-EAST stimulates motivation but is not conducive to rest, relaxation. This is known as “the nightmare bed direction”. Calm unsettling vibes by using somber, rusty pinks, pale yellow. If bad dreams or paranoia persist, display a handful of sea salt in small white ceramic bowl.

Head pointing NORTH-WEST promotes deep sleep and is recommended for parents and elderly family members. When asleep, this head direction is associated with self control, leadership. Colors enhancers are yellow, white and pink or metallic copper or brass tones. To diminish responsibilities, place ivy, curved glass statue or a picture of water lilies near the headboard.

George asks…

is it possible to define muchausen by proxy without physical evidence?

M by Proxy 95% of the time it is a woman(mother) causing her child damage in order to draw attention to herself

BACKGROUND:having been sexually abused as a child, the now Mother has a child after several lost babies (unclear if they were miscarriages, stillbirths, or worse).The child grows up to be 15 years old and the mother wants to indulge the girl’s modeling career.

The father’s totally against it, ultra-religious/controlling; so the mother/daughter team lie to him to get modeling gigs done.After they befriend a few people in their new area (they seem transient), the mother starts telling people how abusive the husband is, how he treats the daughter.Eventually the daughter confides in someone other than her mother that the father is creeping on the daughter in the shower.He also asks the daughter to sleep in the parental bed each night.Keep in mind this 15-yr-old appears to be a full-grown woman.The child refuses most nights.

It has come to light that for about 4 years prior this child was forced to sleep in the father’s bed while the mother worked 2nd shift.The child objected so much she would plead with her family friend to sleep over so as not to be alone with the father.Already it appears a case of the mother, having past sexual abuse herself, has not developed the skills to protect her daughter.

Now the mother had been hiding the modeling from the father, letting an older model drive her daughter to modeling gigs with the mother’s written blessing.She also permitted, about 1x per month, to let this older model take her daughter to outside events such as a concert or amusement park etc.

Unbeknownst to this older model trying to help the family, the Mother had been letting him take her daughter to modeling events while secretly backstabbing him to the modeling community.She seemed to suspect the child became infatuated with this man as a father figure, let this man develop an emotional bond with the child, let him pay for meals/clothes/modeling supplies/gas, but then started a police investigation on him through the modeling community.

Instead of directly asking her daughter/this man about how close they had become, she got the police involved & watched/listened as the cops grilled her daughter.Since nothing had happened no charges were filed. HOWEVER, this man never knew it was the mother who started the investigation until months later.

The mother/daughter team made it appear that conditions were SO bad in the home, this man offered to let them move in after the father got physical with the daughter.So even though the Mother thought this man was after her daughter/vice-versa, the 2 women moved in with this man.

Keep in mind, that this mother has a habit of lying, manipulating, etc.She spied on her daughter’s communications (text/chat/Facebook) all for the purpose of spying; never interceding.In one instance an older boy had been getting graphic with the daughter online, and sometimes the mother would pose as the daughter.The mother knew for sure the kid was after sex with the kind of talk he showed, this kid had a steady girlfriend, yet took her 15 year old to this kid’s house on a date?

This mother also watched as the 15 year old had multiple online/text relationships with several creepy photographers at the same time.The one claimed to love the 15 year old (no jokes/kidding this was real to him), while the worst one asked the 15 yr old to shave her private parts completely & meet him at a hotel for a bikini/lingerie ‘photoshoot’ for $.I doubt the meet ever happened but the daughter did give him their home address to mail ‘payment’.She tried to get some mother-approved garments paid for by the photographer.

The entire time the mother/daughter lived with this model, the mother showed even more anti-social behavior disorder symptoms.Claimed she would not open up to the man because it would appear like flirting, when in reality she was keeping her schemes to herself.The 15 yr old on the other hand had opened up to the man about her cutting of herself to relieve tension, her suicidality, etc.The man found out what meds she was on, that they made suicidality WORSE for teens, and suggested she get off the meds.

In the end the mother was only using the man as a shield against the Father until He learned his ‘lesson’; she eventually bit the hand that feeds.After the man appeared to have spent $ getting her daughter her modeling portfolio/pictures developed she moved all their things out while the man was at work with help of ‘church’ folks.

Mom had been secretly forcing the daughter to meet with her dad, even though the daughter insisted she wasn’t ready to move back in.The daughter quasi-attempted suicide by gun, pills, etc. But it may have been an hysterical gesture.They have since fled the state.

In closing the mother has a habit of putting her daughter in harm’s way with men
Thanks Mo for your curt response. I typed it correctly to begin with but got ahead of my typing; spellcheck just now corrected it to Munchhausen with 2 h’s.

It’s hard to describe the better part of a year in 5000 characters. It may have meandered but it was meant to show a series of events, patterns, showing the mother either being very irresponsible with letting the daughter run amok on the internet & bringing potential predators to their doorstep. Or was it a form of causing her daughter harm by putting her in dangerous situations time & time again?

I think it’s a form of jealousy. The father wants to see his daughter behind the shower door. He wants to give his daughter inappropriate hugs. He wants his daughter to sleep in the parents’ bed. He forced the daughter to sleep alone with him as a younger child despite the child being obviously uncomfortable with it. The father feels nothing he does is wrong, until explained at length by the daughter. He does not listen

Admin answers:

‘Munchausen’s by proxy’ is now called ‘induced or fabricated illness’, so no, what you describe is not it at all. A mother not being able to protect her daughter from possible sexual predators when she herself was sexually abused is not at all uncommon. Sounds like a mother completely unresolved with the issues of her past, and seeking to deny the issues affecting her daughter. A modelling career sounds like one of the worst career options in these circumstances.

Sharon asks…

To make a baby boy in the bed(Sexually)Should the woman be on top or from behind?

Admin answers:

It doesn’t matter what position the women is in as the males sperm is what determines if the baby will be a boy or a girl. You can check this website: for more information.

John asks…

My rat just had babies today and I have some questions?

My rat gave birth to a litter of around 6 if im not mistaken. She’s taking care of them fine. I have her separated from my male and she’s in an aquarium which I know is bad but it’s all i have right now.

1) I plan on getting 2 cages, I’m keeping the daddy with the male babies and the mommy with the female babies. When should I do this? I want to avoid all possible chances of pregnancy again because I can’t handle anymore so I won’t to do this before any of the babies are able to reproduce.

2) WIll the daddy eat his babies if I put the males in there when they are “fully grown” and have reproductive organs?

3) Will keeping all the babies be okay? I’m not comfortable giving them away but I don’t want any behavior or territorial problems with them

I appreciate every answer I get. I know not to trust everyone on yahoo answers so some outside sources on where you got your information would be great. Regardless, I will look up every answer and take them all into consideration.
4) I have her eating rat blocks, but I put a dog biscuit with 15 percent protein in there just to be safe. Will she have enough protein to survive?

Admin answers:

1) You’ll be able to sex the babies at about ten days of age; the girls nipples start to show just before their fur comes in, so make sure you keep a close eye on them in order to sex them. Sexing them by looking for testicles on males is not always reliable; frequently male babies testicles do not descened until after they are sexually mature, resulting in a lot of pregnant sisters. The babies will start to wean at about three weeks of age, but you can still keep them with their mother until they are between five and six weeks old; any older than six weeks and you are risking pregnant rats again.

2) The baby boys will be fine with their Dad. You can start introducing him to them as soon as you want to; I usually do it when the babies start to open their eyes (again, at about ten days old). I usually give him some of the bedding from the mother and babies cage throughout those ten days though so that he is familiar with their scent and understands what is happening. When you do introduce him to the babies only do so for a few minutes at a time to start with; make sure he doesn’t try to carry them off anywhere; the males have very strong parenting instincts too, and will try to take them to their nests sometimes.

3) Keeping all the babies will be ok. Just be aware that if either the mother or father has health issues they may have passed them on to the babies; my point being that if there is a hereditary condition, by keeping all of the babies you are potentially setting yourself up for heart ache and big vet bills. I completely understand your reticence in rehoming them though. It is very hard to disengage from rats, especially if you have known them since the day they were born.

4) Mum should have had a higher protein diet throughout her pregnancy, and still needs it when lactating. Lab blocks do not provide the protein required for this special time of her life. Dog biscuits are not ideal either, but will help a bit. Baby food for humans is actually perfect for her .. Plus if you are providing her with it, it will give the babies something easy to start eating when they want to start solids, rather than attacking lab blocks straight away (though some will try anyway). Alternatively you can try scrambled eggs, or EMP.

I can’t give you sources. I have been practising this stuff for fifteen years, so honestly can’t remember where I learnt all the different things from. Much of it is from experience. I would highly recommend joining some rat forums though. Again, be wary that not everyone is an expert though, just as with here. Just because someone is a breeder, or runs a rat rescue, or has had rats for decades does not mean they’re automatically right; it’s very easy to have been repeating the same mistakes for fifteen years after all. The more times you read the same information, the more likely it is to be accurate.

Carol asks…

baby hamster questions?

when do i know when to separate male and female?
if the mom is not having another litter can i keep the mom and girls together until i find homes for them?
About how many inches from the bedding should the waterbottle be?
any special foods i can give 10 day old babies

Admin answers:

You will have to sex the babies and separate them after 28 days (4 weeks) which is the time when they become sexually mature

I wouldn’t keep the mum with the girls. Keep her on her own to give her a break and a chance to recover

The water should be in comfortable reach for the babies, so they shouldn’t be stretching too high. Try to fit it so that they can drink from it in a sitting position

An ideal mix made from wheat germ, first-stage dried baby food, and small broken particles of hamster food

Hope I helped :-)

Paul asks…

why would an 11 year old wet the bed & not take showers in the mornings?

she wets the bed every night..she won’t take showers in the mornings so i have to wipe her entire body with baby wipes. can someone please tell me possible reasons why she is doing this? please & thanks!

Admin answers:

This will sound horrible but is there any chance she was sexually abused as a child, or is currently being sexually abused. Bed wetting, and poor hygiene are both warning signs of some sort of abuse. Are you her mother? It would seem that where she wants you to clean her with baby wipes, it isn’t a sexual abuse problem because she isn’t freaking out when someone is near her privates, but on the other hand maybe she’s hoping you will notice bruising, or blood. It could be warning signs of emotion or physical abuse too.

In my opinion you should really check into this. When i first read this sexual abuse seemed to be a very concerning cause. I was sexually abused as a child by my brothers, and i wet my bed until i was 10.
During consoling sessions i found out that its normal for abused children to wet the bed.

Maybe you should look up some more effects of abuse and see if your daughter matches any more of them. I’d take her to a doctor, and tell him that you heard bed wetting and poor Hygiene were signs of abuse, doctors are trained to be able to spot abuse when they see it. Talk to your daughter. Let her know that she can tell you if someone is hurting her.

I hope that i am wrong. And i will be praying for this young girl, hoping that I am in fact, totally off base.


Nancy asks…

New baby bunnies :) Info?

Today I went to buy a bulb for my tortoise and on the way home theres an RSPCA center… so I went in looking at the rabbits and guinea pigs etc, just to give them a stroke and some attention…
and I saw the most AMAZING baby rabbits you’ve ever seen.
One is white and one is grey they’re tiny and fluffy and I fell in love.
They’re not for adoption yet because they’re so small and that I couldn’t reserve them :(
So I’m really worried if I’ll be the first one there when they’re available.
Im going back at 8 in the morning tomorow .. and I will everyday until they’re ready because I want them so bad.
Anyway, appart from a run and hutch, sawdust (not cedar or pine), hay for bedding, rabbit food, water bottles, bowl etc etc.
Is there anything else I need?
I do own 2 little piggies so I know most stuff but I’ve not really had rabbits before.. I’m guessing they’re kinda the same.
Don’t worry I’m dedicated to all my animals, my 2 guinea pigs live in a 5 foot C&C cage in my room and get cleaned everyday, veggies, vitamin c etc… all they need and I’d never leave the rabbits without food or anything, they’re both the same sex so wouldn’t breed (I know how to tell and would take them to the vet anyway but I know I may have to house the seperate that’s fine) I’m just wondering if theres anything else they need, e.g toys like guinea pigs?
I do have a rabbit but my gran lives with it and I don’t want to ask for it back… it’s more or less hers now.

Admin answers:

Rabbits do not need bedding. You can use stuff like short carpeting, old sheets, cardboard, grass mats, and tiles as flooring.

You are going to need a litter box and some paper-based litter like Carefresh or Yesterday’s News. Some people use untreated wood pellets for stoves as well.

Now for the warnings: two baby rabbits may get along great when you first get them, but you have to know that once they hit sexual maturity you may have to house them separately for the rest of their lives. Rabbits have this reputation for being small friendly cute animals that love other rabbit’s company, but the reality is that they are territorial and aggressive and only like the rabbits THEY like.

Second, you are going to house them separately anyway, because breeders and vets alike can mistake the two sexes while they are still young. Rabbits can get pregnant as early as 12 weeks, and males can be sexually ready as early as 10 weeks. You are going to have to get them both fixed in order to avoid this, as well as hormonal issues and life threatening diseases they may get from being intact.

A baby rabbit diet looks like this: unlimited alfalfa pellets and unlimited alfalfa hay. Once they’re about three months of age, it’s time to slowly start introducing vegetables. One at a time, over the course of a few days, watch for any negative reactions. Things like runny poo that won’t stop after a few days of giving that one vegetable. Once they’re seven months old they need to be slowly switched to a diet that looks like this: 1/8 of a cup of timothy pellets per five pounds, 1-2 cups of vegetables, 1 tablespoon of fruit and unlimited grass hay.

You are going to need a cage that is large enough for your rabbit to stretch out twice its length as an adult, room for the litter box, hiding spot and toys. Most pet store cages are not big enough for this, so you are better off building your own cage. Even with the biggest rabbit cage you can find, you are still going to need to let your rabbit out for at least two hours every day for supervised play time.

Rabbits are not pets for people who cannot spend a lot of time with them. You can’t go away for a weekend without having someone to come and check up on them at least twice throughout the day. If they run out of food or aren’t eating, life threatening complications can arise in just a few short hours. Any little change in behaviour can be cause for alarm, so you have to know what your rabbits are like.

If you are willing to house them separately and properly bond them once they are both fixed, then yes, you are ready for two rabbits. They take a lot of work, they need to be cleaned daily with more thorough cleaning weekly and monthly. They need various kinds of food and food at all times.

Edit: Rabbits need various toys. They get bored very easily, so it’s best to have a rotation system in works. Offer a few at one time, like a cardboard box with shredded newspaper, a toilet paper roll with hay stuffed, hard plastic baby toys like rattles or slinkies, hard cat toys like balls with bells inside. You can get untreated wood and paper. Anything they can pick up and chuck mostly.

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Posted by Admin - April 16, 2014 at 4:05 am

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